View Full Version : What Are You?
Topiary Lady
10-05-2005, 03:49 PM
ARE YOU A LIBERAL, CONSERVATIVE, OR SOUTHERN CONSERVATIVE?
Here is a little test that will help you decide.
You're walking down a deserted street with your wife and two small children. Suddenly, an Islamic Terrorist with a huge knife comes around the corner, locks eyes on you, screams obcenities, praises Allah, raises the knife, and charges you.
You are carrying a Glock 40,, and are an expert shot. You have mere seconds before the terrorist reaches you and your family.
What do you do?
LIBERAL'S ANSWER:
Well, that's not enough information to answer the question!
Does the man look poor? Or oppressed?
Have I ever done anything that would inspire him to attack?
Could we run away?
What does my wife think? What do the kids think?
Could I possibly swing my gun like a club and knock the knife out of his hand?
Why am I carrying a loaded gun anyway, and what kind of message does this send to society and my children?
What does the law say about this situation?
Does he want to kill me, or would he be content just to wound me?
If I were to grab his knees and hold on, could my family get away while he was stabbing me?
Should I call 9-1-1?
Why is this street so deserted?
We need to raise taxes, have a paint and weed day, and make this a happier, healthier street that would discourage such behavior.
This is all so confusing!
I need to debate this with some friends for a few days and try to come to a consensus.
CONSERVATIVE'S ANSWER:
BANG!
SOUTHERN CONSERVATIVE'S ANSWER:
BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click.....(sounds of reloading) BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! click
Daughter: "Nice grouping, daddy! Were those Winchester Silver Tips or Hollow Points?"
Wadi66
10-05-2005, 04:14 PM
Conservatives expanded response beyond BANG; its easier to ask forgiveness than get permission.
Post of the day TL... maybe the month. That was good. I live the "nice grouping daddy" part. LOL
Schmitty27
10-05-2005, 05:07 PM
Might be nice to shoot out his kneecaps and other disabling places then see if he had any information to leak. Chances are if he's in a back alley with a knife he isn't too high up on the ladder though so...BANG!
Madcowhunter
10-05-2005, 05:21 PM
If you shoot him in the knee caps, the only thing coming out of his mouth will be screams. But of course, they are known to have been able to take an inhuman amount of pain.
Nice post TL, welcome back.
Goose
10-05-2005, 05:48 PM
Option 2 for me; I certainly wouldn't be wringing my hands over the issue while my family was in danger.
if you are an excellent shot IU'd shoot the knife outta his hand and kick his ass.
Are you sure you could? What if his nickname was "tree" or something?
FKLBRLS
10-05-2005, 07:42 PM
Probably regular Conservative. I would try, as much as possible, not to kill him. I would shoot him in the arms and legs, and once he was incapacitated take his knife. I would then cart him off to the cops. Or I might beat his ass, along with my family. A family of 4 beating the crap out of an incapacitated terrorist. That sounds great. THEN I'd take him to the cops for interrogating.
Argonath
10-05-2005, 07:44 PM
I'd blast his kneecaps and collect a reward for protecting the nation. BLAM! BLAM! "Mmmmmmm. . . . you'l gather me a hefty ransom! hahahahaha!!!"
RightisRightLeftisWrong
10-05-2005, 08:01 PM
BWHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! BANG! Im the Crazy Southern Conservative.
And TL nice to see you agian.
7i7i7
10-05-2005, 08:05 PM
Me- Shot with the attempt to maim, then take that knife and behead the real infidel!
First rule. If you have to shoot - destroy the target. None of this maiming crap. If threatened with deadly force you would be wise to return deadly force or you'll probably leave your children as orphans. Think of them first. The guy with the knife would be plant food.
Oi_Ve
10-05-2005, 11:24 PM
a single shot to the head, use as little force as necessary. he might have friends nearby
Madcowhunter
10-05-2005, 11:28 PM
Me- Shot with the attempt to maim, then take that knife and behead the real infidel!
Yea, every kid wants to see their father saw off a man's head eventually.... or you could just kill him and get it over with.
7i7i7
10-06-2005, 04:04 AM
I only thought it was humor, lol.
a single shot to the head, use as little force as necessary. he might have friends nearby Well, from a practical standpoint that may make sense, but defensively speaking, it's two to the body and see if he stops. If not, one to the head and re-evaluate.
Oi_Ve
10-06-2005, 09:29 AM
Well, from a practical standpoint that may make sense, but defensively speaking, it's two to the body and see if he stops. If not, one to the head and re-evaluate.
fair enough. whatever gets the job done the most efficently. Overkill's a sick concept to me...and just plain wasteful
Android
10-06-2005, 10:09 AM
Several shots, center of mass. He's Dead. You continue to your lawyers office and spend your entire life savings defending yourself and your family in the court of law. "Poor innocent middle eastern student, shot and killed while asking local man for directions" - Next on CNN.
Sorry to sound so negative this morning, but come on, we all know it.
Oi_Ve
10-06-2005, 10:47 AM
"Excuse me, I engraved a map of the city on my knife (with my other knife) and I was wondering if you could show me where Main Street-" *BAM*
Redneck
10-06-2005, 12:33 PM
Just conservative. One shot, one kill.
Topiary Lady
10-06-2005, 12:48 PM
Well, because I'm such a wonderful person, I would not fire the first shot to kill him. First I'd shoot him in the crotch and then I'd let him live a few more minutes while I hurl a bunch of insults at him before finishing him off.
That's just me though.
Oi_Ve
10-06-2005, 12:50 PM
Well, because I'm such a wonderful person, I would not fire the first shot to kill him. First I'd shoot him in the crotch and then I'd let him live a few more minutes while I hurl a bunch of insults at him before finishing him off.
That's just me though.
Christ let the man die with some dignity.....at least let the man die being a man LOL
Madcowhunter
10-06-2005, 04:11 PM
Well, because I'm such a wonderful person, I would not fire the first shot to kill him. First I'd shoot him in the crotch and then I'd let him live a few more minutes while I hurl a bunch of insults at him before finishing him off.
That's just me though.
!
That's lovely.:tongue:
Well, it would be a horrible decision to have to make. Even though you'd be justified, there are those that would try to throw in you prison for it. Spending your life savings might just be what you'd need to do unfortunately. Let's all hope we are never in that situation.
Arbiter
10-06-2005, 09:36 PM
After seeing the one beheading? i would have to say that 7i7's response isnt so far off for me. I dont know how to respond to such a video. I would shoot him once or twice then i probably would torture him. The dog doesnt deserve any better. It would be better for my first shot to have killed him. Maybe a small cage in my basement would be good... as i saw off his fingers and toes... yea graphic and gruesome but who are we talking about here? i dont care about any of that gruesome or your just like them shit. because im not i would be doing it out of defense and revenge. Revenge is bad? so what ask nick berg
Dagummit
10-09-2005, 06:52 PM
Southern style, definately!
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